I was once asked, “Whose pain is worse? My loss of losing my young husband and being left with a young child or my friend who has lost her son? Everyone keeps comparing our pain.”
I hope the following will be of help to you as it was for me many years ago. It goes like this: To me, my pain is worse; to you, yours is worse. But why do we compare? I am hurting and so are you. Please allow me to have my pain, and I will allow you to have yours. Let me voice my anger, and you can voice yours. Let me release my guilt, and you can release yours. Let me cry on your shoulder, and you can cry on mine. Let me have my grief, and I will let you have yours. And then, one day, let us smile and hug and thank each other for being there. Whose pain is worse? Does it really matter?