When you say “I do” at the end of the alter and seal your love with a kiss, you may never imagine that you and your spouse will be separating someday. Navigating through a divorce is extremely difficult and can cause feelings of inadequacy and hopelessness. When dealing with this it is normal to feel alone.
If you are struggling with coping with your divorce, here are a few ways that may help:
- Take personal time. Although you should not isolate yourself, it is important to spend time with yourself. Take this time to learn new things about yourself such as any new interests and hobbies. You may be surprised by the things you learn about yourself. When you are in a relationship with someone, your life becomes blended with theirs and you may take on hobbies that don’t necessarily reflect your interests.
- Embrace the new normal. Establish a new routine that compliments the changes in your life. Many times, people get used to their daily routines and can be resistant to new things. By creating a new routine, you will begin to forget old traditions you may have established with your spouse. This way you can make room for better things to come into your life.
- Find support. Sharing your feelings with friends, family, or a support group will help you to process them in a positive way. It is important to talk about your feelings. Sharing your emotions with others can also help to remove some of the
burden. The metaphorical “weight” that may be on your shoulders may be lifted through the catharsis of talking to someone who cares about your well-being.
- Pray. The following is an excerpt from The Peace Maker by Ken Sande. “When you place your focus on God through prayer, you can begin to experience something that does not seem logical: The hostility, anxiety, and inner conflict with which you have been dealing will begin to give way to a peace so unexpected that Paul says it will “transcend all understanding”. Although this peace may be only internal at first, it will often grow into an external peace – or reconciliation – that will likewise surpass the comprehension of those who have been observing your conflict. When God works in his people, things begin to happen that don’t make sense to the world. What a wonderful way to catch people’s attention and bring praise to God.”
Spiritual Care Support Ministries’ Care Café is open to the public every Thursday for Coffee and Conversation from 10am- noon. Please join us for fellowship and encouragement, and a hot cup of coffee or tea. Spiritual Care Support Ministries has a team of counselors available to offer support and a listening ear. You can contact us by phone, Facebook, email, or through snail mail!